


Confessions

by Phangee



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Anal, First Time, M/M, Rimming, porn with plot?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-01
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-12-30 04:24:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18308135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phangee/pseuds/Phangee
Summary: Hisoka takes Illumi out to dinner late at night and makes sure the raven haired man has a wonderful night to remember





	Confessions

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading :)  
> ~cardboi

Illumi walked towards the bathroom and breathed out softly, eyes closed for a moment. Gently pressing on the door, he went inside and stood by the mirror.

The sea-green outfit he wore was rather tight, not really his taste, but it was perfect for tonight. It left his shoulders and a portion of his upper arms exposed as well as a small part of his collarbone. 

He breathed out and reached behind his back to fix his braid. Clearing his throat, Illumi smiled in the mirror to himself and started complimenting the things he didn’t like about his body to gain some confidence. Lots of people know that Illumi hides his emotions well, but once he’s alone, or with someone who he trusts, he lets loose for once. He had plenty of insecurities, but he only had time to look at the obvious ones. 

Like his eyes. They were large and black; He couldn’t even find his own pupil. But for today, and hopefully everyday after this, he’d find them rather marvelous and attractive. _He_ finds them attractive, anyway. 

The next was his nose. It’s a bit pointy and sticks out a bit too far for his liking. Yet again, _he_ liked it though. _He_ once said that when they kiss, his nose hits the other’s cheek gently and it always makes him smile; and it must be true because nearly every time they kiss, the lunatic did smile against Illumi’s lips. 

A small smile was seen in the mirror, pale cheeks now painted light red. 

Finally, his skin.. Illumi hated the color, though when walked into the restaurant today, _He_ looked the raven-haired man up and down and told him, _“Your outfit really compliments your skin”_ as if he knew Illumi was insecure about what he was wearing. 

He zoned back in and looked down at himself one last time and returned back to the table.

Illumi knew what was bound to happen after this late night dinner. He thought that’s why he was antsy about tonight.. 

He sat down across from the redhead who was wearing a loose black suit with his hair down for once. The man smiled as he grabbed his champagne glass and sipped it. 

They were going to get closer tonight and go all the way. It was exciting yet nerve wracking for Illumi. 

He swallowed the lump in his throat and played with the corner of the paper placemat in front of him. “I’m sorry for taking so long” Illumi said, remaining calm on the outside. Though the other probably sensed that he was in fact not calm like normal. 

“Oh, I don’t mind at all” Hisoka said, leaning back against his chair lazily. 

It made the raven-haired man sort of mad at how composed the other was.. Hisoka didn’t seem nervous at all. 

“So tell me about Kil...” Hisoka said, gazing into Illumi’s eyes.

“Killua...” Illumi thought out loud, trying to remember what Hisoka was talking about. “Oh, right. I heard around that he and Gon made it to floor 213 of Heaven’s Arena.. Killua’s last opponent surrendered upon seeing his nen” 

“Mm.. Is Kil that strong now?” Hisoka murmured, looking at his champagne glass. He lifted a finger and swirled it around the rim. “I’ll have to take him—“ 

“You can’t fight my brother”

“What would you do if I did?” Hisoka looked up to the other and smirked. 

“Well.. I won’t hesitate to kill you” Illumi said without emotion. 

Hisoka was silent for a bit, cheeks flushed red. “Oh, I love it when you say that to me” The redhead swooned and held a hand to his stomach. “Especially in that tone” 

Illumi stared at him. Thankfully, the waiter came by and set down their plates of food. He gave one last look to Hisoka and began to eat, stomach growling for something good. 

——

“Thank you again” Illumi said they walked out of the restaurant, stomaches full.

“No, thank you” Hisoka said and placed a hand on the lower part of the other’s back. His hand was warm compared to the autumn weather outside. 

The two got to Hisoka’s black Camry, Illumi sitting in the passenger seat. Hisoka sat down in the drivers seat and started the car, looking to his boyfriend. 

Ilumi knew what he wanted. 

Illumi sighed out heavily. “Do you not have the courage to ask me to kiss you? Well, I guess being strong doesn’t necessarily mean you also have to be confident-“

Hisoka grabbed the other’s neck forcefully and pulled him over, Illumi’s body nearly in his lap. He glared down at Hisoka, hands on his shoulders tightly. Illumi knew he would never hurt him so soon, so he didn’t budge. 

Hisoka’s fingers lingered across the pale man’s neck, leaving him shivering. Illumi’s breathing hitched the tiniest bit, but he kept it under control as he was used to doing so because of the extensive Zoldyck training. Illumi stared down into Hisoka’s eyes, grip tightening on his shoulders. 

“I’m taking you back to my place” Hisoka whispered and leaned up, kissing the other a bit roughly. Hisoka bit down on Illumi’s bottom lip and the raven-haired man pulled back from the redhead. Hisoka’s hands were on Illumi’s waist now. 

“Alright, but you have to take the long way home..” Illumi breathed and fell back into the seat. 

Hisoka sighed heavily and frowned. “Oh, fine..” he said sadly. The redhead pulled out of the parking spot and turned on the radio.

 

The car ride was silent and it was fine for Illumi, but he knew Hisoka was different. Hisoka hated silent places. He needed attention and loved making scenes. It’s been 8 minutes since they last spoke, a surprise to the raven haired man. Illumi was waiting for the redhead to do something any minute. 

Just as Illumi looked out the window, Hisoka glanced over to him and his right hand left the steering wheel. It snaked it’s way onto the raven haired man’s thigh and squeezed roughly. 

Illumi made a soft noise and glanced down to Hisoka’s hand. It moved slowly, back and forth, fingers moving gently. He did this only occasionally, but each time he did so, it just felt indescribable to Illumi. 

“Shouldn’t you be focusing on the road?” Illumi whispered, setting his right elbow on the door. 

Hisoka suddenly dug his nails into the younger one’s fleshy skin, grinning ear to ear. “I can multitask, Illu”

Illumi glanced down to Hisoka’s hand, seeing his nails puncturing the sea-green clothes. It didn’t hurt the submissive man at all. Hisoka’s nails let go of Illumi’s thigh soon and he started moving it up and down again. Illumi closed his eyes and leaned back into the seat, relaxing against the redhead’s touch. 

“Well, what is it that you want?” The raven haired man asked in a tired voice. He closed his eyes. 

Hisoka looked over as he pulled up to a stop light. “Would you like the truth or a lie?” He chuckled gently, dragging his nails across Illumi’s thigh. 

Illumi held back the chill that ran down his spine. He could feel the redhead grin next to him, and Hisoka was probably sensing the way he was getting Illumi worked up. “It’s green” spoke the pale one, knowing the light just switched colors. As Hisoka looked forward, Illumi pushed his hand off his thigh. It returned to the steering wheel. 

The raven haired man opened his eyes and looked towards the redhead silently. He was really handsome with the dim city lights flashing across his face. Illumi’s eyes trailed his profile until he got down to Hisoka’s neck. 

As they neared redhead’s apartment Illumi wondered what tonight would be like. Would it hurt? Would it feel weird?

Illumi was a virgin. His mother never let him out of the house until he was 18, and then he was still working for the family and getting side jobs. He also had to watch over his little brothers and sisters from time to time. Illumi has never been in a relationship since it has never really entered in his mind as a thought. Being an assassin was more important at the time. Then Hisoka entered the hunter exam 3 years ago, at the same time Illumi did, and that’s how the two met. Illumi didn’t have feelings for Hisoka for a long time. After knowing him for about 2 years though, the two went out to the beach at midnight one day because they thought it would be nice to chat there together, but somehow towards the end of the night, Illumi ended up leaning in towards the redhead as he was leaning towards Illumi and our lips locked. It was an odd feeling at first, but Illumi came to like it. Hisoka’s lips were soft and he smelled a mix of vanilla and strawberries, something the pale one rather enjoyed. They didn’t really exchange any conversation after that, but they gave each other a look that said “we weren’t leaving each other anytime soon”. 

 

——

 

When they got to Hisoka’s apartment, Hisoka took Illumi into his room and opened up a dresser drawer. 

Illumi groaned gently as he pulled off the top part of his outfit. He laid it on the bed and then turned to face Hisoka. The redhead was smirking, holding up a white button up for the other. Illumi took the shirt and rubbed his head. “Thanks” 

“Mm... what should we do?” The redhead murmured as his fingers touched Illumi’s side gently. Illumi ignored Hisoka’s hand and worked around him to get the tight shirt off. Illumi dropped it on the bed and shrugged. He faced the redhead, holding the button up in his hands. “Let’s watch a movie” 

Hisoka smiled faintly. “You’re a tease” he murmured and glanced down to Illumi’s chest and back up to his eyes. 

“You only asked me what we should do” Illumi said and slipped the shirt on. Hisoka grabbed the front of the shirt and started buttoning it up. Illumi watched him silently, glancing between his concentrated face and his thin fingers working on the shirt. When Hisoka finished, Illumi backed up and slid out of his pants. He walked to the DVD shelf in Hisoka’s room and sat on his knees, searching for a movie while the redhead got out of his clothes and into a button up as well. Illumi grabbed a few movies and stood up, walking to the other as he took off his black dress pants. Illumi showed Hisoka the three movies he chose. The redhead set his pants on the bed next to the other’s and itched his bare thigh. 

“Love Actually, The Holiday or Breakfast At Tiffany’s..?” Hisoka said in confusion. He looked to Illumi. “That’s an odd bunch”

The raven haired man shrugged and pointed to Breakfast at Tiffany’s. “Well, I’ve heard good things about that one”

“Then shall we watch this one?” Hisoka grinned a little. Illumi nodded and glanced up to the other. He took the 1960’s movie and made his way towards the living room. The only things that were in the living room were a red, L shaped couch, a flatscreen tv and a tall plant beside the couch. Illumi bent down and put the disc into the DVD player, feeling Hisoka’s presence behind him. He stood up and turned his head to the side. Hisoka was sitting on the couch. “What is it?” Illumi said. 

“Oh.. just looking at the view” Hisoka chuckled and crossed his legs. The raven haired man felt his cheeks heat up at the comment. Hisoka turned the tv on as Illumi sat down beside him, gently pulling at his braid’s pony tail holder. It came out and Illumi ran his hands through his long, black hair. 

Hisoka gazed over. “Oh~... you’re so marvelous to watch” he said and wrapped an arm around the younger one’s waist, pulling him closer. Illumi took a moment to look at Hisoka. He was right in line with his neck, which was a bit irritating. He’d rather see Hisoka’s face instead, but this’ll do. 

As the movie loaded up, the redhead took the time to brush out Illumi’s semi-curly hair with his hands. His touch made the raven haired man relaxed and content in his large arms, and Hisoka saw it. Hisoka moved his hand away when the movie started, which made Illumi sigh softly at the loss of the redhead’s touch. Illumi set his head on Hisoka’s shoulder and began watching. 

——

Throughout the movie Hisoka kept grabbing at Illumi’s legs and thighs, rubbing and squeezing them. In return the raven haired man played with Hisoka’s shirt, once in a while slipping his hand in between the cloth to touch the older one’s bare chest. 

After a little bit more of the touching and closer cuddling, Illumi’s heart started racing. He suddenly couldn’t even pay attention to the movie anymore and it has only been on for 20 minutes. He shifted to a more comfortable position that was closer to the redhead. Illumi’s cheeks were red and his skin was starting to get sweaty. 

A man and woman on tv were dancing at a party, then the man leaned down and kissed the woman lovingly. Illumi’s shoulder twitched a little and Hisoka looked down to him. “Doing okay?” He hummed, clearly knowing something was off yet again. Illumi nodded and breathed out, it being a little shaky. “Yeah” 

As the movie went on, the only parts that stuck out to the raven haired man were the ones where two people confessed their love and when someone opened curtain and it revealed two people making out. 

Illumi glanced to Hisoka yet again. This time the redhead didn’t look back down. His neck was still in line with Illumi’s eye level. Bubbles starting popping in his blood and without much thought, Illumi leaned over and kissed the neck in front of him. He pulled back a tiny bit, but then placed his lips against Hisoka’s skin again, opening his mouth a little wider. Hisoka’s grip on Illumi tightened and he angled his neck better to give more access. “So _you’re_ making the first move, hm?” Hisoka grinned and breathed out slowly. His words only encouraged the other and Illumi moved onto Hisoka’s lap to straddle him. Illumi felt so lost in the other’s touch and warmth.

His lips attacked Hisoka’s neck and jaw sloppily, but the man under him seemed to enjoy most of it. Hisoka wrapped an arm around Illumi’s waist and the other free hand reached up and grabbed the black hair dangling near him. He pulled it back in an instant, making Illumi gasp from pure shock. The raven haired man’s eyes were wide, face fully red and he was panting like he just got done killing someone from the Phantom Troupe. Hisoka smirked from Illumi’s reaction and he leaned down, kissing the other’s neck now. His hand loosened in Illumi’s hair and Illumi grabbed Hisoka’s shoulders, suddenly so flustered and amazed by the new feeling. Illumi didn’t know what to do, what was he suppose to do? Hisoka moved his tongue and teeth across Illumi’s neck as if he was searching for something. 

Illumi grabbed Hisoka’s hair and moved closer into him, wanting to feel every inch of the redhead. Just as he did so, Illumi gasped again and tensed up. Hisoka’s mouth was biting down in a corner of the younger one’s neck, and he was grinning. 

“H-His-“ Illumi stopped, feeling Hisoka’s mouth move against the spot some more, then he started sucking on it. Illumi’s body shuddered and his toes curled tightly, small noises coming from his mouth. There was a ‘pop’ sound when the redhead pulled back. Illumi looked to Hisoka quietly, breathing shakily. Hisoka’s eyes were fixated on the raven haired man’s neck. His eyes were wide and they held a new sort of gleam. From his perspective, he finally realized how pale Illumi’s skin actually was. The hickey he left stood so much and it made him excited. 

Hisoka’s lips attached to Illumi’s neck again and he started sucking once more. 

“Ah” Illumi whimpered and leaned into the touch, burying his head into Hisoka’s hair, then tugged it. “Mm..” He panted gently and let the man suck everywhere on his neck. Hisoka was so skilled and Illumi wondered what else the redhead knew. 

After a few minutes, Hisoka pulled back. He looked at Illumi, enjoying the artwork he left on his body. Illumi was left panting and blushing heavily. He felt like a different person all of a sudden. Illumi just stared at Hisoka, wetting my lips. He nodded shortly and Hisoka stood up, setting Illumi down to his feet. 

The redhead guided Illumi towards his room and Illumi walked in front of the mirror. “Hisoka!” The raven haired one suddenly gasped as he felt around his neck at the small and large bruises. They filled up his neck, and of course they would bring attention right away since his skin is so pale. 

Hisoka grinned and walked over. He kissed the side of Illumi’s neck and started unbuttoning Illumi’s shirt with one hand. “Aren’t they wonderful? You’re so gorgeous..” He murmured and pulled the button up off, leaving the raven haired man’s chest exposed. Illumi leaned back towards Hisoka and looked at the two in the mirror. It was quite the picture. 

Hisoka slipped his thumb into Illumi’s underwear. “Illu..” he whispered into my ear. “If you want me to stop... just tell me” he purred and kissed the younger one’s ear gently. Illumi made a small noise and nodded, cheeks red. “In front of the mirror?” He asked softly, becoming slightly shy. 

Hisoka grinned. “Mm.. only if you’d like” he looked down at the other. Illumi nodded silently, standing up straight. He bent his body so his hands where holding onto the mirror and his face was nearly touching it. Hisoka watched with big eyes, a half smile forming on his lips. “Oh?” He murmured to himself and slowly pulled the underwear in his hands down. 

Illumi shyly closed his eyes and breathed out slowly. He felt his underwear lower to his ankles and he lifted his feet out of them. Hisoka kicked them aside and bent down to his knees. 

“Ah, what are you— oh my—“ Illumi’s face went bright red as he felt Hisoka’s face against his ass and his mouth was moving against it. Illumi let out tiny gasps and soft moans, shaking already. He glanced to the redhead from the mirror and whined softly. Just the view of Hisoka eating him out was enough for Illumi to go over the edge, plus this was his first experience with anything sexual with another person. 

Illumi reached down to touch himself, panting quickly. Suddenly Hisoka’s hand grabbed at the other’s wrist roughly. 

“Ah-! Hisoka!” Illumi shouted and arched his back. “Let go of me” He spit, whimpering the entire time. Hisoka only laughed quietly and gripped Illumi’s wrist tighter. It was so tight that he’d break it if he went any tighter. Illumi pressed back against Hisoka, body twitching wildly from all the contact at once, and the feeling of getting restrained turned him on even more for an odd reason. 

“Damnit” illumi panted, head leaned back, legs shaking. His bound wrist was struggling around and his fingers tried to scratch at Hisoka. This only made the redhead excited and he flicked his tongue more against Illumi. 

The raven haired man pushed his body against the mirror and groaned loudly, grinding down on Hisoka. “Mmgh-!” 

Hisoka let go of Illumi’s wrist and dug his nails into his fleshy thighs now. The pale man squirmed a little bit more until he spilt his seed all over the mirror in front of him while whimpering, then collapsed back into Hisoka’s arms after he stood up. 

Illumi stared at the mirror, shaking still. He turned his head up to Hisoka and only felt his stomach get butterflies again when he caught the redhead smirking down at him. 

“Shall we keep going?” Hisoka asked, his forehead sweaty. 

Illumi turned around slowly and kissed Hisoka’s collarbone. He nodded and rested his head on the other’s chest. 

The redhead grabbed Illumi’s waist and lifted him to the bed which wasn’t far away. He laid Illumi down and spread his legs. 

Illumi let out a soft groan and pushed his head back into a pillow, impatiently waiting for Hisoka to touch him again. 

“I’ll be careful, I promise—“

“Just- just hurry up. I can’t wait much longer” Illumi sputtered, his cock hardening again. 

“You’re so very eager, Illu~” Hisoka murmured and took a finger, inserting it inside the other. 

Illumi’s eyes widened and he winced in discomfort. He sat up and grabbed Hisoka’s shirt to pull him closer, clearly wanting comfort. “H.. how long is it going to last?” He breathed and kissed Hisoka’s cheek. 

Hisoka grabbed the raven haired man’s side and rubbed it soothingly. “Just be patient..” he said, then laughed quietly. 

“Wh-What?” Illumi spit, trying to get into a better position with his knees bent. 

“You get hurt so much while trying to assassinate people and barely react to it, but when one finger is inside you, you end up hurting. I just don’t understand the logic” Hisoka said jokingly. 

“Mm.. sh-shut up” Illumi blushed and hit Hisoka’s chest with his fist. He laid down and scooted down onto the redhead’s finger a little. He let out a small breathy noise and nodded. “Keep going..”

Hisoka used his free hand to caress Illumi’s thigh, pushing his single finger in and out slowly. He eventually added in two fingers, making the pale one wince again. Hisoka smiled. 

“How are you suppose to take me if you can’t take my-“

“Stop”

Hisoka’s eyes widened a little. He pulled his fingers out and Illumi sat up. “I want you to take me right now. I can handle it” he said, pushing his hair back. His face was all red and he was flustered, but he did look determined. 

Hisoka stayed silent. Would Illumi be able to take him?

“Well” Illumi muttered and grabbed Hisoka’s shirt. He pulled down so that the buttons popped off and the shirt hung loosely open. “What’s the best position for me?” He asked quietly and stood up. Illumi reached up and traced his fingers against Hisoka’s throat. His wrist throbbed with pain from what Hisoka caused, and it was definitely going to leave a bruise tomorrow, but that didn’t matter. He wanted to show Hisoka he wasn’t going to fall apart so easily. 

Hisoka was nearly blinded by the way Illumi was acting, but he kept a smirk on his lips. “Sit on the bed on your hands and knees.. we can try that first... see if you like it...” The redhead moved towards the other. Illumi sat down on the bed again and turned around. He got onto his hands and knees, and yeah, he did hurt a little from the fingers inside him from before, but he ignored that feeling. He gripped the sheets and closed his eyes as he heard Hisoka pulling off the rest of his clothing. Soon enough, the raven haired man felt a cock pushing through him. “Nn!” Illumi lowered his chest and laid his head on its side on a pillow. He screwed his eyes shut and made noises while Hisoka kept pushing in. 

“Is it okay?” Hisoka asked gently, moving the black hair out of Illumi’s face. Illumi nodded brokenly and bit his lip. “Keep g-going” He murmured, keeping his eyes closed. It stung. It hurt so much. It was like Hisoka’s fingers in a way, but yet it wasn’t. This was something so foreign and new. 

Hisoka started thrusting slowly, watching Illumi. He didn’t have much of a reaction, so he slowed down until a complete stop. 

“I don’t like this position” Illumi said and opened his eyes. He kept his gaze away from Hisoka as his eyes were slightly watery. He sat on his knees and rubbed his back. Hisoka crawled onto the bed and kissed Illumi’s upper back. 

“I want control” Illumi looked to the side at the redhead, cheeks red again. 

Hisoka blinked and looked to Illumi. “If that’s what you prefer, alright” he moved up onto the bed more and laid down. Illumi crawled up to sit on Hisoka’s toned stomach, chills running down his back. He lifted his body up and reached under him to position Hisoka’s cock to line up with his entrance. Then he slowly sunk down onto him, moving his body into a more comfortable position. His jaw opened slightly as he got to the hilt, feeling full and much better now. He didn’t like the other position at all compared to this one. Hisoka grabbed Illumi’s waist, cheeks red. “You look lovely” he whispered gently and raised a hand to pull Illumi’s hair onto his back to see his face and chest better. 

Illumi only nodded in bliss and raised and lowered himself after a few seconds of silence. He made gentle noises, breathing a bit heavily. He set his hands on Hisoka’s chest and started bouncing on top of him. “Hisoka..” Illumi breathlessly said. 

Hisoka gripped the other’s waist and dug his fingers into his skin, dragging them slowly to cause a bit of pain. 

“Mmg..” Illumi moved his hands around frequently to get at a better angle. 

“Are you having fun?” Hisoka grinned, making gentle noises under the other. “You were so antsy for no reason” he breathed out, but froze completely when Illumi quickened his pace and grabbed the redhead’s throat with both his hands. 

“Well that’s easy for you to say” Illumi said through gritted teeth, gripping the side of Hisoka’s neck tighter. 

“Ah-“ Hisoka breathed in sharply and closed his eyes lazily. 

“You’ve had- had done it before” Illumi muttered and brought himself so far above Hisoka that he nearly fell out, but when he was about to, Illumi pushed back down quickly and roughly, arms shaking now. 

Hisoka gripped Illumi’s thighs and scratched at them slowly, just taking in Illumi’s toughness and words. He wanted to hear Illumi sound angry more. A small smile grew on his lips. 

“You’re the one who- who suggest- mm- suggested we do it on my hands and knees... first. L-look who was wrong” Illumi dug his nails into Hisoka’s neck. “You— Hisoka! A-!”

Hisoka easily pushed Illumi over so he was on the bed now. The redhead didn’t have any mercy as he thrusted into the other quickly. Illumi suddenly wasn’t talking anymore, but moaning and squirming around in pure ecstasy. The raven haired man wrapped his arms around Hisoka tightly and next his legs, enjoying every inch of this. 

“Is this.. what you wanted?” Hisoka smirked and kissed Illumi sloppily on the lips. Illumi pulled back, nodding quickly with his jaw hanging open. “Mm!” He started thrusting upwards to copy the redhead’s movements as he got closer and closer to the edge.

Soon enough Illumi pulled Hisoka closer and pushed his body up against his, shuddering and moaning into his neck. His body went limp as Hisoka finished out. Hisoka eventually coming to a stop himself. He pulled out after catching his breath for a minute and laid down next to the panting raven haired man. 

They were silent for a long time. Illumi was the first to speak up. 

“Hisoka?”

“Mm?” 

“You make everything feel possible...” 

Hisoka turned onto his side to face Illumi. He gently wrapped his arm around the other and pulled him close. 

There was nothing else to say. The silence spoke for itself and that made Illumi feel like time stopped. Hisoka was his and he was Hisoka’s. Nothing and no one would tear them apart from here on out.


End file.
